Walk With Me

3/5/09

As I pulled into the parking lot, I noticed one of the kids, an adolescent girl, wandering outside the school building. I kept a close eye on her, and soon noticed that staff were nearby. The girl circled the building, trying to stay a step ahead and out of sight of the staff who were supervising her. She startled when she heard my car door. As she turned to look at me, I called out to ask her what she was up to. Despite attempting to elude staff, she began to approach me. 

As I pretended to not be concerned about her elusive behavior, she walked to my car and asked if I had Ross with me. As I continued to speak casually with her, she walked with me to the back of my car, greeted Ross, and continued to walk with me as I went about my normal arrival routine, continuing to ask her questions about what was going on. As she stood petting Ross, she answered my questions, as if this was our normal interaction. Staff arrived, and I filled them in. The girl continued to stand with Ross, no longer concerned about getting away from staff. I invited her to walk with me as I headed towards the office, passing through the school building as it was "on the way." The girl walked next to Ross, staff within arm's reach. I continued the casual conversation about what was bothering her, and she cooperatively identified her classroom. As we stood at the door, problem-solving the situation, Ross served as a distraction, keeping the girl calm enough to continue talking and to think clearly. Without a hitch, she calmly made a plan to return to class. Ross and I parted ways, off to our office, the girl and staff checking in with the teacher.

It Takes a Ross

2/16/09

I had the day off - sort of. Even though it was a work holiday, I had the pager. Which meant that eventually, I had to work.

When the pager went off, Ross and I headed in. I knew Ross was my only hope of keeping the work day short. Little did I know just how much work Ross had to do that day.

Things had settled down when we arrived. As I walked onto the unit to check in with a boy, he was in good spirits and excited to meet Ross, whom he had heard about. The rest of the teens and preteens were so exited to see Ross, and they took turns swarming him in groups of 3 and 4, each trying to get in some pets and kisses. The boy, who had just arrived a few days before, but who has been with us before, asked excitedly about getting a stuffed Ross. Evidently, his therapist had clued him in to Project Replicate Ross.

Just when we were about to head home, the pager went off again. Ross and I headed over to the most acute unit, where a young adolescent girl was being aggressive towards staff and had disrobed. The past few weeks have been especially difficult for her, and no human intervention appears to be improving the situation at this time. Fortunately, Ross can do things no human can. 

As we walked onto the unit, staff informed the girl that Ross was there. She quickly redressed and came out to the hall, where she sat on the floor and pet Ross. He licked her face and hands, and she giggled with glee. After a few minutes, some of the other kids, passing by, took the opportunity to visit with Ross. Ross licked the face and head of his favorite boy, spiking his hair like only dog slobber can. After a few more minutes, the girl who is largely nonverbal walked by. She caught a glimpse of Ross out of the corner of her eye, and stopped suddenly, exclaiming with excitement. She cheerfully approached Ross, where she sat down on the floor with him, stroking him and trying to pull him into her lap to cuddle. Ross laid there without concern as she tugged on his collar and neck scruff, trying to pull his 60-plus pound lying body into her lap. 

After a while, another page came. Ross and I had heard the screams and scuffles on the unit, and Ross appeared concerned. Not for his own safety, but for the children from whom he knew the sounds came. Ross and I entered the unit, where a boy was standing on the other side of the room, visibly upset, but currently not a danger. He declined visiting with Ross, and I reassured him that Ross was there if he wanted to visit with him, and Ross was concerned about him, but he didn't have to visit with Ross if he didn't want to. Ross stood, patiently waiting, as the humans attempted to help the boy with our words. Eventually, the boy calmed and walked over to Ross. Ross did something strange - he turned his back to the boy and ignored him. In an effort to prevent the boys' feelings from being hurt, I had Ross sit, so as to prevent him from moving further away from the boy. Ross sat, then laid down. The boy stated calmly, and with concern, that Ross was probably worried because of how he had been acting. Ross laid perfectly still, and the boy stroked him. As the boy stroked Ross and asked questions about his Guide Dog training, Ross began to perk up, and eventually leaned in for a kiss. The boy then calmly and happily moved on to eat lunch, a transition that had him very upset just a few minutes prior. I had no idea what Ross was doing when he turned his back to this boy. But Ross knew. Ross knew that this boy needed a different approach than the other kids. He needed to reach out to Ross and to prove to himself that he could make the choices that showed others he was safe. Ross was ready, waiting, and he knew.

And despite how much I was amazed by Ross' intuition and ability with this boy, I was not prepared for what came next.

On the other side of the door, a large pre-teen girl was still escalated. She was desperately attempting to pull the plexiglass covers off the windows, from the outside. Ross has been a relatively new intervention for this girl. It took her a long time to even notice his presence, but once she became aware, she became a fan. She rarely speaks around him, and instead just sits and soaks up his love. I spoke to her through the door, informing her that Ross was there to see her when she was ready and could be safe. She ignored me, moved away, and began to sob. Just when I thought she might be ready, she got up and again began to pry at the windows. Ross and I visited with the now calm boy, while we waited for the girl outside to calm. After a few minutes, I saw her sitting motionless on the other side of the yard, her back against the building. As Ross and I prepared to go outside, a concerned staff member asked if we wanted him to go out too. This girl has a history of being very aggressive towards others. But I wasn't concerned. I knew she wouldn't do anything to hurt Ross, or me (the person who brings Ross). 

As we crossed the yard, I told her Ross was worried about her. And, as we approached her, her eyes lifted slightly. I saw Ross zone in, and I warned her that she was probably going to get a big kiss. Sure enough, Ross stepped in and gave her one big lick up her face. For just the briefest moment, I saw a glimmer in her eye. And then, it changed. She hung her head and sat motionless again. And Ross knew. He sat next to her, perched as if on guard, watching their surrounds, aware of everything going on outside around them. He sat, and watched, and guarded. I'm not sure what he was guarding her from, but he knew. I stood nearby, simply holding the leash and observing. Watching, but not so much knowing. Ross did not lean in for any more kisses. He did not lay down or turn his back on her. He sat and guarded. As long as she sat, he sat right next to her. Confident, when she was not. Every once in a while, she slowly reached out and gently stroked his back. He turned to glance at her, assuring her it was OK, and quickly returned to his position. Another boy, outside the fence, threw a large stick inside the yard, calling to her to use the stick for unsafe reasons. With her guardian at her side, she ignored the boy, sitting, her head hung, reaching out to gently touch the dog that understood - the dog who knew that she didn't have the strength to do it on her own. This time he didn't turn. He didn't need to. She knew. (This girl's therapist has already picked out a Ross replica for her.)

As we headed out of the building, I checked with staff to see if the little kids could visit with Ross. They had been singing his name from inside the building as he had been on guard outside. It wasn't a good time for the whole group to visit Ross, but one little boy, the boy who dubbed him "Rossy" and who falls asleep with his stunt double every night, was so eager to see him! Staff brought him out to the hall, where he wrapped his arms around Ross. Ross covered his face in kisses, and the boy slid to the floor, giggling and encouraging more. Ross paused, then stepped in to smother him with more kisses. The more he kissed, the more the boy giggled, and the more Ross kissed. The true, wholehearted, laughter that Ross brings out in these kids is more heartwarming than words can describe. It's a laughter that is rarely heard when Ross isn't around.

And, just when I thought it was time to go home, the pager went off again. The day had come full circle - the page had come for the same boy who we started with that morning. This time, Ross stayed on his bed, where he was exhausted from the days' work. When I arrived, the boy eagerly asked again about the stuffed Ross. He was able to tell me exactly how the Ross replica would help him: When he feels sad, it makes him mad (very common for our kids). And when he gets mad, he starts acting unsafe. But squeezing something really hard helps him. Something that he can squeeze as hard as he wants without having to worry about hurting or breaking it. Something like a stuffed Ross :) (Thank you to all of our Project Replicate Ross donors, I was able to immediately go pick out a stuffed Ross to his liking.)

Not-So Honorable Guest

2/11/09

Ross and I were invited to attend the Guild Meeting for our campus - an event in which the Guild and Auxilary members receive updates from employees as to the services we are providing, campus improvements, and agency updates. Initially I thought, Wow! I must be someone big now - I was invited to attend the Guild Meeting! Then, I realized that it was really Ross who was invited, but since he can't speak or drive, the invitation came to me ;) And, it turns out, Ross was not only invited, but the guest of honor!

Ross was not feeling very honorable though... The meeting was hosted at the very lovely home of one of the guild members, and a request was made that her hardwood floors be protected from Ross' nails. Having hardwood floors and dogs myself, I understood her concern. Unfortunately, Ross is going through a nail clipping phobia, so that option was not an option. Which only left one other option: dog boots. Fortunately, I have a very nice pair of Vibram soled boots for my dog who hikes and snow shoes. And, on this night, he was kind enough to lend his very cool boots to Ross, who did not think they were cool at all, much less honorable. 

In an effort to provide some desensitization prior to the meeting, Ross practiced wearing the boots at home, where he could be humiliated in the privacy of his own house, with the curtains drawn, and only his family to laugh at him (with love, of course). By the time he had to wear them for the Guild Meeting, he did not walk quite so funny, but he hung his head in shame. Eventually, he laid at my feet and slept through the meeting. 

Ross, of course, was a perfect guest. My coworkers and I spoke of the amazing work Ross does with the kids, and the importance of Project Replicate Ross, given that Ross is not available at all hours of the day and night. Two days later, a box of Ross replicas arrived, with an anonymous note from "a friend." 

Looking Out for Number One

2/3/09

Today, Ross and I got up early and arrived at work first thing in the morning to be available for a girl who has been refusing her blood draws due to a needle phobia. Ross can be very soothing in such situations, assisting the kids in remaining calm increasing compliance in the process, while I, also needle phobic, turn and close my eyes :) When we arrived, I was informed that the girl was still refusing her blood draw, despite knowing Ross was coming. But, her reason shocked us all: she told the nurse that she always yells, screams, and grabs things when she has to have her blood drawn, and she didn't want to scare or hurt Ross. Even though he was there for her, she was looking out for him!

Keep Those Puppies Coming!

2/2/09

To date, I have received donations of 25 stuffed puppies, the majority of which are black Lab "Ross replicas"! 22 of these donations came from one single person!

Thank you to everyone who has spread the word, is searching for Ross replicas, and who has donated so far! While I have not yet started the distribution process, one of our staff found a donated pup to be very soothing when Ross was assisting a child and wasn't available for him :)

A Good Bye

As Ross and I walked across the parking lot this morning to the office, I heard a honking from behind me. I turned around to see one of Ross' kids in his dad's truck, waving excitedly. The boy was discharging and heading home.

Knowing he would want to say good-bye to Ross, I turned around and headed to the truck. Unable to reach Ross from the window, I had him open the truck door so he could say good-bye to Ross. As soon as the door opened, Ross stepped up into the truck, his hind feet remaining on the sidewalk, his front paws in the boy's lap. Ross gave the boy big kisses across his face, then, as quickly as he had climbed up, he climbed down and turned towards the office, as if to say, "My work here is done. Good Bye my friend."

Rossy!!!!!

1/21/09

As we were headed out of the office for the night, Ross and I stopped by one of the units to drop some papers off. When we arrived on the unit, the girl who is largely non-verbal immediately came over to pet Ross. She was quickly surrounded by other kids, all of them petting Ross and leaning in for kisses. After a few minutes, two of the kids ran across the unit, calling for Ross' biggest fan, exclaiming, "Ross is here! Ross is here!" His friend came out of his room and joined the group. Ross immediately covered his face and head in big sloppy kisses. As the kids swarmed around Ross, lavishing him with love, the girl (now sitting on the floor) pulled him into her lap and wrapped her arms around him. Ross took the opportunity to stand in her lap, his paws on her chest, covering her face in kisses as she slid to the floor laughing.

As we left the building, we were greeted just outside by the little kids, walking back to the building in a nice single-file row. Shouts of joy filled the cold night air as they sang Ross' name, one little guy exclaiming, "Rossy!!!!" Ross greeted each child as they passed, and when he reached the young boy, hardly taller than he, he slapped a big wet kiss right across the boy's face!

Project Replicate Ross

Last night, I sent the following email to friends and family: 

Many of you have either heard me tell stories, or have read Ross' blog,

about the amazing effect that Ross has on the kids at my work. Today, I was thinking about how much even the stuffed "Fake Ross" helps the the kids at work when he's not available. Currently, we have an entire unit of little kids who use "Fake Ross" to calm them or to help them fall asleep at night. It got me thinking: wouldn't it be wonderful if we had more than one stuffed Ross to go around?

We typically have about 50-60 kids in our residential and day treatment programs. The residential kids live there. Away from their homes and families, and even their own pets.

Unfortunately, as a non-profit organization, our funds are limited for buying "extras" such as stuffed animals for the kids. It got me thinking about how I might be able to get more stuffed Black Labs donated for the kids, and I finally thought to start with the people who I know, and who

know Ross :)

So, I'm dubbing it "Project Replicate Ross." I would LOVE to fill our attic (where we store donated supplies) with stuffed Black Labs of varying sizes for any kid who wants one. Then, those children will have their own stuffed dog that can go with them when they discharge.

The responses were overwhelming! Friends have searched their own homes, stores, and websites looking for Ross replicates, as well as spreading the word with others. I am so excited about the possibilities of donations we may receive. It is truly incredible the effect that Ross has had on the kids, so much so that even a stuffed look-alike makes them feel better!

If you would like to participate in Project Replicate Ross, please contact me privately. All donations are tax deductible.

Happy New Year

1/2/09

I decided Ross needed to start the new year off doing something other than sleeping, so we decided to head to the little kids' unit to visit. When we entered the building, Ross was immediately greeted by the girl who rarely speaks. She stroked Ross, then wrapped her arms around his belly and picked him up (one of her favorite tricks). Ross hung limply, just waiting patiently. She set him down when reminded that he's too big for that now :) Ross laid down on the floor, and she sat down with him, gently stroking him most of the time, and every once in a while tugging on his fur. Ross laid motionless, unbothered by her investigation. She spit on the floor (her meds make her over-salivate). I gave her a paper towel, and she wiped up her spit on the floor, then gently wiped Ross' leg, making sure he didn't have any spit on him.

We then entered the little kid's unit, and Ross was loved on by one of the older girls on the unit. The rest of the group then transitioned back inside from playing. Each little kid sat in front of his/her bedroom door, and waited patiently for Ross to visit. Ross and I walked around the unit, greeting each kid individually. Ross sat for each kid, washing their hands and covering their faces with kisses until they laughed so hard they could barely squeak out, "Enough!"

Christmas Kisses

12/25/08

I received a page on Christmas night that one of the kids at work had been in a restraint. She was upset that she was unable to visit with her family on Christmas as scheduled, and escalated to the point of endangering others.

When Ross and I entered the building, we were immediately greeted by a staff member. I then heard the familiar, "Buddy!" as one of Ross' biggest fans realized he was there. Kids poured out of every room, huddling around Ross, preventing either of us from being able to move from the entry. Ross covered the kids' faces with kisses, making them laugh and smile on Christmas night, despite being separated from their families.

Even the young girl who rarely speaks stood over Ross, gently stroking him, and stated, "He's sweet."  It was the first time I had ever heard her verbalize emotion regarding him.

As we entered the unit, Ross came upon a quiet girl sitting on the couch. They hadn't met before. Ross immediately walked over to her, sat at her feet, and rested his head in her lap. She asked questions about him while gently stroking his head. It didn't take long for Ross to start licking her hands and face, and a smile to appear.

Ross reluctantly left his new friend to visit the girl I had received the page for. She was sitting in front of her bedroom door, trying not to think about the things that had gone wrong that day. Ross gently stepped into her lap and covered her face with kisses. He sat with her, gently licking her, as she told me about how she missed her family, what had happened that day, and all the things she was worried about.